Recording vocals for an orchestra chorus project.
In February 2009, my 15-year-old self thought it would be a good idea to start uploading videos on YouTube. I was doing a lot of singing at my secondary school at that time and I really loved memorizing the lyrics to Japanese songs, so it made sense to me to start uploading Japanese covers. I don’t exactly know what my goal was at that time — perhaps I wanted to challenge myself, maybe I thought I could become a professional singer, or maybe I just wanted attention, a shot at having my time in the limelight. Whatever it was, I am certain that the me back then never thought that I would ever reach this far. Five years later, here I am with a YouTube channel that has over 8,000 subscribers and 1,200,000 views. But despite this ‘success’ (I guess that’s how most would perceive it to be), I now find myself starting to drift away from the community that has shaped the way I am today.
It’s probably just the realization that singing isn’t what I want to be doing in the future. After starting college, I became less and less able to upload content on my channel because my time was being taken up by projects. I used to make covers to blow off steam from school but more often than not, it became a stressful experience for me. I was never content with the quality of my recordings anymore, and I got so tired from just thinking about all the things I had to do to ensure that the upload would be in the best quality possible. I often spent more than 6 hours working on a single 3-minute upload, without getting much satisfaction from it because it didn’t feel like I was making any progress as a person. I was only losing a lot of the free time I needed for other things I really wanted to do.
What my computer screen looks like when I’m audio mixing.
The past five years being in the YouTube Japanese cover and Vocaloid community has really been swell. I’ve met a lot of people from different parts of the world and have gained friendships that I’m sure will last a lifetime. I’ve grown from that prideful teenager that I was into an adult (wow, it’s so strange calling myself that) that understands the hardships of dealing with the harsh anonymous criticism that comes with putting content up on the Internet. I also learned how to manage collaborations and deal with problematic people. Along the way, I managed to pick up some technical skills in content creation, and I’ve learned some Japanese as well.
However grateful I am for the experience of owning my YouTube channel though, the time must come when I need to say goodbye and move on to experience something new. This blog and the YouTube channel that comes with it is a whole new adventure for me, and it’s really started opening up so many opportunities for personal and professional growth. As a result, I’ve started slowing down on the uploading frequency of my covers in order to dedicate more time to this endeavor.
In the short time since I started Kooky’s Save Point, I’ve become a lot happier. I now give myself time to read and learn more about the world, instead of spending hours on end confining myself to polishing skills that I’m not that interested in anymore. Singing and audio mixing are, of course, still hobbies that I genuinely enjoy (I still upload on covers on my channel once in a while) but I’ve learned that writing is what I want to do most of all.
PanickedPixel 
It’s a rare thing when someone’s interests don’t change between childhood and adulthood, but it’s still such a strange experience to look back on things left behind that you had once seen as always being a part of your life isn’t it?
At any rate, it’s awesome that your new endeavor is proving to be rewarding! The best of luck to you in it! Also, I just noticed your awesome background! Did you make it yourself?
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It is strange, no doubt! I’m still in that weird transitional stage where I’m trying to get used to being an adult.
I sometimes have this urge to go back to my singing and spend my time fully on it, but I know it’s not something I would enjoy doing in the future. I’m just glad I’m able to distinguish where my true passion lies. 🙂
On the topic of my background: I wish I could say I did make it myself, but I actually found it on Tumblr. Not sure who made it as Gooogle image search doesn’t show any results. D:
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I just found out about your through your Youtube, I was checking out the Sades headset through Amazon mainly because I need a Headset but want something that is decent for the price. I really liked how you explained each detail on why it was worth buying even with the defects.
Anyways, continuing on about your blog post. Honestly, I’m 29 and I am STILL getting used to being an adult. I even have 2 kids now and yet I’m continuing figure out my life, but I think it mainly depends on how you’re raised and with some other factors at play, such as current/previous friends you may or may not have had.
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I think something you had/have as a passion and then develop new routes to adventure yourself into happier experiences is something that happens with most everyone. As a child/teen/young adult you generally have a hobby that you take seriously that you turn into a job (or hope to be a future job). Then realize “I don’t think I could do this my entire life, the pressure, the dedication and amount of hours you need is pretty heavy, where is my time for “fun””.
Even child stars grow up and grow out of the movie/singing scene. It’s a natural human process, eventually you get bored unless you change it up. Which is a lot of reasons why celebrities/scientists/doctors/developers-heck any profession really, change their tone in music/movies/art/games/etc. Career pathing especially in the world where you do consistently the same subject day in and day out will get bored to most anyone, eventually.
Granted you probably don’t need me to tell you that, I’m just giving my own 2 cents on your blog post and how your life blossoms or changes. Because, I myself am still in the works of figuring it out, I give myself 6 more years to fully find my true harness and I think it will be something to do with Medical in some way or even Cooking in another right.
It’s kind of crazy, but your life really does flash before your eyes. I think that is why mostly all persons are pressured into doing something they may or may not want to do for a very long term of their life. Or they’re like me and are still contemplating what exactly it is we would like to settle down with when we finally get to the age of old.
I’m sorry for the lengthy post, I always do this >.>, bad habit with me, lol. Again, it was nice to find out and I plan on checking out all of your videos on Youtube ^_^.
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